To: Fire Ball
This is my sister, Jen, she was born when I was 15 years old.
This is her newest son, Justin. Jen has 3 boys, Brandon-17, Ryan-7, Justin-3months.
When I was 17 and she was 2, I got married. Shortly after I married my Mom, Dad, Brother and Sister moved 180 miles away, back to the Bay Area. Though we saw each other frequently, usually once a month or so, we never created a sister bond between us. Rather Jen was more to me like one of my own daughters.
She played with my daughters, and my relationship with her was mother-like.
As a matter of fact she was more of a sister to my girls. They grew up together creating the memories that sisters often do. There were camping trips, Country Fairs, bicycle riding, playing at parks, trips to the zoo, swimming, eating ice cream outside on hot Summer days, and lots of sleep overs.
When Tonya was 7, and Kristina was 5, I had my third daughter, (1986) Beth.
Tonya and Kristina came to see me in the hospital when Beth was born.
When Beth was born she joined the circle of sisterhood.
I continued to be a second mother to my sister.
As time passed, Jen and I lived very different lives. While Jen grew up in the big city, I was safe in my country life tending to my family.
For so many years I couldn't grasp her lifestyle and she thought mine one of mere simplicity and dullness.
During those years we never talked much. She stopped coming to the country to visit, only on rare occasion, and when we traveled to the city for a visit, she was busy with her social activities and had little time to hang out with us anymore.
Time just moved on, as it always does.
One Summer (1999) my safe content country life fell apart.
(Caveman - yes the same one I now share my life with-walked away from me and the life we created, after 22 yrs of being together. We divorced /2000, and re-married /2005/ 5 years later. Another story for another time.)
I don't remember how or when it happened but I called my sister, who was then 25. She had been married and divorced herself, with a 5 year old son, and I needed someone to talk to. She listened while I cried my heart out. She never judged me and I never judged her, we just listened to each other. We talked almost every day, she was my confidant, and we talked about unspeakable things. Somehow the gap between us vanished, as if it never existed, and for the first time in my life I had a sister, a real sister.
Jen pleaded with me to come to the Bay Area for a visit. I had never spent time with her since she lived on her own. I desperately needed to get away, away from the small country town, where is seemed everybody knows everybody, and everything. I couldn't wait to get out of town and head to the city where no one knew me, or my story. I packed my bags, and Beth and I headed out for the 3 hour drive ahead.
Jen decided she was taking me out on the town, in true "city life" style.
This is us together getting ready for our very first "sisters" date.
One of many, many, to follow.
Jen was 26, I was 41.
Summer of 2000
Oh- the times we had.
(umm... stories never to be revealed)
The city became my grown-up play ground with my sister by my side.
The stories from the city never traveled to the small country town.
I love you Sis.
I love that we can tell each other anything.
I love that we can call each other and if we're not in the mood to talk, we can just say it, and agree that we'll chat later. I love that we can just sit on the porch swing, eating Corn Chex, not saying a word to each other at all, then get up to leave and feel as though we both just had the best time. I love that we don't care about money or things, and that family is all that matters. I love that we both agree NEVER to combine your telephone, cable or internet services, because when you only have a couple of nickles to rub together you want to have a choice of which one to keep for the month. I love you because if we only had a dollar, we'd split in in half and be happy with 50 cents.
I love you too because you are a sister to my daughters as well.
I love you because one day we're gonna take that Road Trip together that we've always talked about.
When we do, the world better look out because FireBall and Skippy will be on the road together. No plans, just where ever the wind takes us, wild and free, following the sun during the day and the moon at night. Who knows Fire Ball, we just may end up in White Rock.
p.s. see you tomorrow sis
The Girasole Lady